Ah: feels like 2004 again, doesn’t it? Cagey, vaguely intriguing Chelsea/Liverpool match on t.v.? Check. A third morning coffee? Check. ProLine ticket? Check. Multiple web browsers open for following multiple fantasy football teams? You get the idea. In fact, while we’re at it, how ’bout thoughts on some of the biggest spreads since TJP’s mom’s latest night out at Ranchman’s? (As an aside, it’s become so difficult making TJP mom jokes since moving to Calgary. Anyway!) As usual, minimal research went into this.
- CHICAGO (-9.5) over Dee-troit. Detroit won last week; surely they’ll roll over and die today?
- Tampa Bay (+7) over WASHINGTON. This might be the worst game of the entire 2009 season. And get this: two weeks ago, I took Washington in a suicide pool! They barely won, at home, against the St. Louis Rams. The lesson: never take a team that’s going to lose to the Detroit Lions in a suicide pool.
- Oakland (+9.5) over HOUSTON. This spread’s a bit too big for my liking, even though the Texans are this week’s suicide pool pick. In related news, I wonder how Oakland feels about drafting JaMarcus Russell over, among others, Adrian Peterson?
- Seattle (+13.5) over INDIANAPOLIS. Again, this spread seems a bit too big.
- Tennessee (-4.5) over JACKSONVILLE. Tennessee might be the best 0-3 team in recent memory.
- NEW ENGLAND (-1.5) over Baltimore. Great game, this. I still don’t fully trust Baltimore’s offense, even though they’ve given me plenty of reasons for doing so. And, well, it’s only a matter of time before Brady and Moss have a breakout game.
- New York Giants (-10.5) over KANSAS CITY. Next up for the Giants: home to the Oakland Raiders. JaMarcus Russell at Giants Stadium, eh? Think I’ll be benching Darren McFadden next week.
- CLEVELAND (+6.5) over Cincinatti. I know I shouldn’t be picking the Browns, who a, suck; b, don’t have a starting quarterback (it’s Derek Anderson this week, btw); and c, are facing a 2-1 team that was one wacky play away from being undefeated. And yet.
- MIAMI (+3) over Buffalo. I think Miami wins this one outright. This might be when Terrell Owens snaps/walks out on the Bills/strangles Trent Edwards to death.
- NEW ORLEANS SAINTS (-7) over New York Jets. The Jets are getting a bit too much attention. Mark Sanchez might’ve looked good in his first three NHL starts, but he isn’t “walking into the Superdome and outdueling Drew Brees” good…not yet, anyway.
- DENVER (+4.5) over Dallas. Again, I think Denver wins outright.
- St. Louis (+10.5) over SAN FRANCISCO. Like Cincinatti, San Francisco is one wacky play away from being undefeated. I am very, very aware that San Francisco should be 3-0.
- San Diego (+6.5) over PITTSBURGH. Like SAJ says, Steelers games never swing more than three points in either direction. Who am I to argue?
- MINNESOTA (-3.5) over Green Bay. Hey, it’s the Single-Biggest Regular Season Game in NFL History! Brett Favre is about to play quarterback for the Minnesota Vikings against the Green Bay Packers. If he wins, he’ll have defeated all thirty-two NFL franchises.