Last week I heard the song “Welcome to the Machine” by Pink Floyd on the radio…and liked it. I feel pretty confident in saying it was the first time in my life I heard a Floyd song and said, “Wait a second, this is Floyd??! Geez, I actually like this!” Against my better judgment, I went home and downloaded it. When I told Paul about what I’d done, he immediately labelled me “Judas” and “Benedict Arnold”, among other things, and though I tried to fend off the allegations I knew, deep down inside, that he was right…and that I would be, in due course, punished for my actions..
Yesterday, it happened. As I was driving home from Bri’s house, “Comfortably Numb” (possibly the most ridiculously bombastic song ever written) came on the radio. Immediately, I swiched over to the Edge…and when nothing of note was playing there, switched over to Y108, which is possibly the best radio station available in the GTA (it’s based in Hamilton). The song they were playing: “Comfortably Numb”. “Wait a second,” I thought, “I wasn’t listening to Y108 before, was I? I must have been.” So I changed the station to Q107…and heard that stupid, droning, unmistakable bass note again. “Comfortably Numb” was playing on two of my three radio presets! Oh, but the Lord God has a sick and twisted sense of humour. Also, since I’m a creature of habit, I just went back to the Edge; I figured listening to a stupid radio jingle would be a far more edifying listening experience.
So, Paul, you’ll be happy to know that my punishment was swift and severe. Gavin and Gulley, you’ll be disappointed to know that I still have impeccable taste in music, and that the continued existence/popularity of Pink Floyd is evidence that Satan does, in fact, exist. Someday, when I’m ruling the world, I’m going to make a point of striking this band’s existence from the record books; then, and only then, will global harmony be possible.