Instant Karma

Last week I heard the song “Welcome to the Machine” by Pink Floyd on the radio…and liked it. I feel pretty confident in saying it was the first time in my life I heard a Floyd song and said, “Wait a second, this is Floyd??! Geez, I actually like this!” Against my better judgment, I went home and downloaded it. When I told Paul about what I’d done, he immediately labelled me “Judas” and “Benedict Arnold”, among other things, and though I tried to fend off the allegations I knew, deep down inside, that he was right…and that I would be, in due course, punished for my actions..

Yesterday, it happened. As I was driving home from Bri’s house, “Comfortably Numb” (possibly the most ridiculously bombastic song ever written) came on the radio. Immediately, I swiched over to the Edge…and when nothing of note was playing there, switched over to Y108, which is possibly the best radio station available in the GTA (it’s based in Hamilton). The song they were playing: “Comfortably Numb”. “Wait a second,” I thought, “I wasn’t listening to Y108 before, was I? I must have been.” So I changed the station to Q107…and heard that stupid, droning, unmistakable bass note again. “Comfortably Numb” was playing on two of my three radio presets! Oh, but the Lord God has a sick and twisted sense of humour. Also, since I’m a creature of habit, I just went back to the Edge; I figured listening to a stupid radio jingle would be a far more edifying listening experience.

So, Paul, you’ll be happy to know that my punishment was swift and severe. Gavin and Gulley, you’ll be disappointed to know that I still have impeccable taste in music, and that the continued existence/popularity of Pink Floyd is evidence that Satan does, in fact, exist. Someday, when I’m ruling the world, I’m going to make a point of striking this band’s existence from the record books; then, and only then, will global harmony be possible.


10 thoughts on “Instant Karma

  1. Steve-o….you like U2 now…..your conversion to Pink Floyd will inevitably follow….just give it a few years.Oh and something else that I am sure even Liver-paul wlil agree with. No matter how evil you think Pink Floyd are they will never match up to the evil empire that reigns at Old Trafford.

  2. No, it won’t–trust me on this one. And, with regards to your comment for Paul, it might not be so cut-and-dry as you’d imagine; Paul might hate Man United, but he hates Pink Floyd even more fervently than I do, and I’m not just saying that for effect. Although that said, I’ll give credit where credit is due: Floyd is still the only band to have provided me with a bass line which doubles as a punch line. Dum-duh-du-du-dum-duh-du-du-du, dum-duh-duh…somewhere in Liverpool, Paul Hatcher is smiling.

  3. The evil empire no longer reigns at Old Trafford, it was outsourced to Russia, and then Stamford Bridge. I just feel a bit sorry for United and their supporters now – telling themselves they’re just as good as they always were, when they clearly aren’t. Really they’re just…..Everton πŸ˜‰As for Floyd, 7 minutes of spacey guitar, a single bass note, and a drum kit with a gong just doesn’t do it for me. Plus, they’ve clearly influenced Radiohead, an offence punishable by death.Hehehehe…Dum-duh-du-du-dum-du-du-duh

  4. Money, get away.Get a good job with good pay and youre okay.Money, its a gas.Grab that cash with both hands and make a stash.New car, caviar, four star daydream,Think Ill buy me a football team.Money, get back.Im all right jack keep your hands off of my stack.Money, its a hit.Dont give me that do goody good bullshit.Im in the high-fidelity first class traveling setAnd I think I need a lear jet.Money, its a crime.Share it fairly but dont take a slice of my pie.Money, so they sayIs the root of all evil today.But if you ask for a raise its no surprise that theyreGiving none away.Huhuh! I was in the right!Yes, absolutely in the right!I certainly was in the right!You was definitely in the right. that geezer was cruising for aBruising!Yeah!Why does anyone do anything? I dont know, I was really drunk at the time!I was just telling him, he couldnt get into number 2. he was askingWhy he wasnt coming up on freely, after I was yelling andScreaming and telling him why he wasnt coming up on freely.It came as a heavy blow, but we sorted the matter out

  5. I need to elaborate on this point:From the song: “Think I’ll buy me a football team.” Hmm…could it be that we’ve established an iron-clad link between Pink Floyd, surely the most evil band in the history of music, and Roman Abramovich, whose billions of rubles have almost single-handedly ruined English football? I think we have. Thus, we have ourselves a very simple, yet very convenient tautology: both Chelsea and Pink Floyd are inherently evil.

  6. do u have an opinion on whether it is possible to enjoy a song by a band you despise? B/c I’m glad to hear you saying you enjoyed a floyd song. I can also respect hatred for a band; even if i do enjoy that band. I’m trying to think of an example but i’m hardpressed to do so.anyhow, even if it were only for a few brief minutes, then you did enjoy.

  7. Bizarre. I hate Welcome to the Machine. Love Comfortably Numb. Couldn’t give less of a shit whether you like Floyd or not. It’s your life πŸ˜‰

  8. I’m disappointed in both of you–I was looking for *much* more venom in your responses. Instead, Gavin asks a pointed, intelligent question and Gulley waxes ambivalence. But, since we’re talking…1. Gavin, I suppose it’s possible to like one song by a band you generally despise–hence one-hit wonders. Clearly, a disproportionate number of artists are capable of writing one “good” song, then doing nothing of note for the rest of their careers. That said, just because a band is a one-hit wonder doesn’t mean they haven’t produced anything else of note; Marcy Playground, for instance, actually put out a couple decent albums, even though the average person couldn’t name a second Marcy Playground song without Googling the band. But I digress; in short, my answer is yes, and as an example, I offer “No Sugar Tonight” by the Guess Who (still the worst live act I’ve ever seen, by the way).2. Gulley, you do *so* care about whether I like Floyd or not; denying that you do would be to deny at least three years of musical proselytization on your part. πŸ˜‰ In some cases, it worked; see, for instance, playing the Silverchair DVD at three o’clock every morning. But trying to force me into liking Floyd was, ultimately, a failure; I think you see it as a blow to your manhood, and as such you’re overcompensating by pretending not to care. πŸ˜€ By the way, I need to get out of the house more often.

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